3 is a Charm.

Banyak hal yg terjadi dalam hidup gw beberpa bulan terakhir ini.

1. My BFF Mom's passed away.
This is such a shocking news. Secara gue di dlam pikiran gw, kematian itu terjadi dlm jangka waktu yg lama. Ya emang idup ga ada yg tau, tapi ttp aja konsep kematian itu di otak gw yah kalo udah tua (70 or more). Betapa sedihnya gw melihat my partner in crime sedih. Betapa hancurnya gw melihat dia hancur. And betapa tersiksanya gw ga bisa berbuat apa2. Kemudian kebiasaan buruk gw kambuh. Disaat my BFF needed me the most, I am not there. Well I mean IDK if she needs me, tapi seharusnya gw sadar. Yah hidup banyak menyita waktu gw, sehingga gw lupa dengan orang yg sedang berduka. Alhasil dia kecewa dengan gw.
Somehow my mom was right, regret always comes late. Benar2 menyesal, dan gw gw masih memikirkan cara untuk menebus kesalahan gw. And the only way is, just be there. Plain n simple, but hard to do if she's still mad at me.

2. At the same day I met this guy, YRS. So we dated for a couple times and get really close. And again, my bad habbit showed up. Being hard to find. Yah itu kebiasaan buruk gw. Mungkin ini terjadi sesuai keinginan gw di postingan sebelumnya, but it doesn't make it ok. But something he said that I hate the most. Dia berpikir bahwa gw hanya menjadikan dia sebagai a toy to fullfil my sexual desire. WHAT??
I introduce him to almost all of my friend, I even try to find a way to get him into my inner circle, and I even bother to hangout with his friend because I want to get to know those people in his life. And he still thought that he is my fvck buddy? I mean c'mon, nobody in this entire galaxy put such efforts for a fvck buddy.
So the question remain is, what do I want to do next? Somehow, I still want to fight for what we have, though its only been three months. But I believe, I dont know what i believe. Somehow, he makes me fly onto the highest place in universe.

3. The final presentation is coming very soon. As I wrote this post, the remaining days to the DAY are 4. Do I scare? Yeah, but I do believe that God's have an amazing plan. So I need to do my best and give all the rest to Him. But I think  today is the final day, because I need to take care of some administration papers. So I better wake uo early.

So those are the most important update of my life so far. Maybe I'll post a new one as soon as something awesome and exciting happen.

Until then.

xoxo, JH.